Lesbian Vampire Killers

Directed by Phil Claydon

Starring James Corden, Matthew Horne and a bunch of smokin hot babes

Available on dvd in Uk on July 27, 2009 but no U.S. releade date yet

How can a movie called Lesbian Vampire Killers not be that good? I dont know but asking director Phil Claydon could be a start. The reviews of this have been lackluster so far and I can see why. The premise has so much potential but fails miserably to live up to it. Now ive never heard of either of these two main British actors, but apparently they are semi popular tv stars over in England. They are both ok but they just dont have much to work with.
The movie is about this dude that gets dumped by his psychotic g/f for the 8th time. His fuck up fat buddy convinces him they should take a vacation to forget about her. They throw a dart at a map and they vow to go hiking wherever it lands. So they end up going to a small little country town somewhere in England. While there they meet up with a bunch of hot chicks that are also on vacation. One of the chicks is on a quest to find a vampire priestess and her hot friends are tagging along to party.
Once the two friends arrive at the town they go to a bar and meet some mysterious villagers and a crazy vicar who has a daughter thats about to be 18, which is the age that girls that are born there, turn to lesbian vamps. The barkeep refers them to a motel down the street for them to stay at for "free". The two dudes hook up with the hotties and make their way down to the hostel. Once they arrive, the hot chicks are attacked and turned to rug munching vamps in a matter of minutes. Pretty soon the main dude and chick get captured and prepared to be used in a ceremony to resurrect the Queen. So the Fat fuck friend and crazy vicar come to the rescue in the nick of time.
I wont say its all garbage cuz I really like the set pieces and production values. It looked very slick and professional. The special and practical effects were top notch even though it was tame. All the chicks were super hot but there was little to nudity that I recall. Besides the cussing the movie felt very much like a tame "hollywood" type pg-13 movie. Which is not necessarily a bad thing but when you have a movie about vampires that like to lick clit then I think a harder gorier approach would have fit it better. For me with the exception of the occasional f bomb that mad me laugh most of the comedy fell flat. If you are into horror comedy then this is definitely above average but for me it could have been so much better. On a scale of 1-10 I give it a dike's wet dream, 5.8 out of 10.

Trailer