Fantastic Film Festival Movie Review
Parasite 3D
Besides having of the gayest sounding names for a festival ever im actually looking forward to a lot of the movies at this years fest. Last year all i got to see was Feast and Hostel which both totally rocked. This year hopefully i can attend at least 10 of them. Thursday i chose to watch Charles Band's Parasite in 3D. Im a sucker for 3D movies. Ive seen probably about 10 of em total from Friday the 13th, Jaws 3d,Space Hunter to a few kung fu ones, and they've all rocked with the exception of one. The one i just saw, Parasite!
What a total turd. I came in wanting to like it but i just couldnt. The show started off good with Charles Band introducing the movie and telling us a funny story about the producer of the movie, and also implying how he as the director got to bang Demi Moore while he was filming the movie. Then the movie started and it went south from there. The introduction 10 minutes was by far the best scenes of the movie. The main character rescued a topless girl, fought two guys and threw one of them through a window and the other through a door. Then while he was wrestling on the ground a snake jumped up and bit one of the baddies. Then finally the scene ended with him shoving a pole through his stomach and blood squirting out the end of the pole. All this sounds cool but there was one problem. The 3D sucked. It was by far the weakest dimensional effects ive ever seen. There was probably one scene total where it looked like it was directly in front of you and you could grab it, and the rest of the time it was 3 dimensional but still looked far off which pretty much defeats the purpose of the movie. And this movie without the 3D is even worse. It has a underdeveloped weak storyline, cheesy characters and disappointing creatures effects which were done by Stan Winston himself. Charles admitted it was a small budget but this really showed. The same 3 sets were used over and over and the lasers and other effects were cheap looking.
The story is basically the world is in post apocalyptic times and people are fending for themselves to survive. Gas is 40 bucks a gallon and people barter with silver and other items. America is controlled by the government and this orginization called the Merchants, which is never really explained. Anyways this scientist named Paul Dean accidentally gets infected with a parasite he was creating for the Merchants and he flees. Hes on the run with a parasite in a container so he can study it and find a cure for himself before he dies. While hes on the run he stops at a little town and gets a motel room to do research for a cure. This Merchant guard is after him and follows him to the town so he can kill Paul and get back the parasite container. In the town are some generic thugs who rob Paul and steal the parasite. The parasite gets loose and starts killing them one by one by attaching itself and sucking their blood. It basically looks like a big leech with a mouth full of teeth. One of the girls in town, Demi Moore, in one of her first roles helps out Paul and vows to help him get the container back so he can find the cure. The finale is a showdown with the Merchant, Paul, the main thug and the parasite. Sounds exciting but the movie drags on so slow i was constantly looking at my watch and hoping it would get better. But nope the movie has a short little final battle and then bam the credits roll.
The only positives i can say is that Demi Moore even with her cheesy lines, you could still tell she was a star ready to break out and the great introduction with Charles Band. I cant recommend this movie in full faith to anyone thats a 3d fan and definitely couldnt imagine watching it on dvd in 2d. Not a great start to the festival but i still have hope.

Heres the trailer in 2D